positively positive

12/05/2022

People often ask me how I stay so positive all of the time. My response is this; I am usually positive, but my positivity levels vary, so I work on myself. When I say that i work at it, I mean that i try to be positive, even in the most adverse of circumstances. I think I have always intuitively known that being positive is better for my mental health. Being able to find the good or positive in any given circumstance is my superpower.

This doesn't mean to say that I haven't had lows in life - I have. They hit me hard and I also struggled as a life coach to think that I could feel anything but positive. And because of this I went into denial and the more I denied the worse it became. Not only that but the ego clicked in and the inner critic went on a rampage.

After another morning of waking up with no motivation or enthusiasm, I knew I had to change something: Here are some of the steps I took:

* I acknowledged how I was feeling

* allowed myself to feel how i feeling, instead of ignoring it.

* Let go of the stories (thought processes) that i was running, that weren't helpful and that were creating obstacles and getting in the way of my creativity, flow and motivation.

* Made time for myself - introduced a daily routine that included me time. I chose things that I know make me feel great and got me out of the overthinking tendency.

* Put my attention and focus of the very exciting things that are unfolding around me.

* Learnt to be patient and kind to myself.

* Practiced gratitude

I pledged to create a daily practice of looking after myself which included and includes meditation, exercise, good diet, plenty of water and no alcohol. I also set the intention to attract more positive, like minded people into my life.

The results have been phenomenal. The teacher listening to and practicing what she preaches!!!

Do I have days when I feel out of sorts? Yes, I do. Today I have been slightly off-kilter, but instead of wallowing in it, the difference now is that I tune in and listen to the signs. I check in so that I can fine tune my frequency. I allow myself to acknowledge what I'm feeling, so that I can deal with whatever shows up.

If I need to I take time out, I meditate, walk the dogs, do yoga, exercise or simply just sit and listen to some music. I give myself a chance to recharge, re-energise and re-connect. I also make sure that I slot times into the diary where I can do a lot of things I enjoy.

It's simple but not easy - it takes commitment to create new habits. Like most people, I am very busy and used to claim that I couldn't find time for meditation practice. There is a Zen proverb that says: You should sit in meditation for 20 mins a day, unless you are busy and then you should sit for an hour. The loose translation for this proverb is: if something is easy for you work on it a little. If it is hard for you, work on it a lot.

For someone who found meditation almost impossible at first, I promise you it is possible and the benefits you will get are worth the initial effort. Start off with 2 mins, work up to 5 mins, then 10 and before you know it you'll be doing 20 mins before you get up in and 20 mins before going to sleep at night.

I love the following exert from the book the 4 Agreements

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST

Your best is going to change from moment to moment. it will be different when you are tired as opposed to well-rested. Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.